“How you manage your personal life is crucial…. The truth of the matter is that there’s another side of life that is much more important.”
The personal life of the chaplain is so much more than the uniform we wear and the Service Members to whom we minister. Because of the education and experience requirements for military chaplaincy, many chaplains enter the military older than the average junior officer and often already having a family. And, while family members do not serve, they certainly do sacrifice. That’s why one of the top ways for chaplains to succeed in their personal lives is to make sure to prioritize family first. There are enough sacrifices that families make without having to think that the chaplain does not prioritize or care for his or her own family.
This became very real for me when I was a chaplain with 2D Marine Division at Camp Lejeune, North Carolina. During my tour there, I spent a couple years with the infantry at 2nd Battalion 8th Marines and then 1 year with 2d Combat Engineer Battalion. I deployed with both battalions. Between field exercises, training events, and deployments, I was away from home a lot. My kids leaned heavily on the support system they had in their friends and schools.
As my time in Division was winding down, my wife and I were looking forward to leaving Camp Lejeune and moving on to something else. That’s when the kids approached us and asked:
“IS THERE ANY WAY WE CAN STAY HERE ONE MORE TOUR?”
One more tour in the area would mean that our oldest would be able to graduate from the high school she had started and not be forced to move her senior year. It really wasn’t what my wife and I had envisioned for us, but after talking about it and praying about it, we decided to see about staying.
The answer was, “Yes.”
We stayed at the same base and I moved from Division to Training Command. Though it wasn’t what we originally wanted, sometimes we make choices for the good of our family over everything else. My time at Training Command was actually a HUGE blessing. Our daughter graduated salutatorian of the high school. We made some incredible friends we NEVER would have made had we left.
Prioritizing family can be hard, especially when we try to weigh career progression and advancement, but one day we all hang up the uniform for the last time. The job ends. Family is still family. When that day comes and we’re no longer called “Chaps,” will our families know that, in spite of their sacrifice, THEY were the ones who were number 1 on our priorities list?
~ Chaplain Chris Linzey, United States Navy
See all ten of the top ways to succeed in the personal life of a chaplain in Chaplain Linzey’s new book, Military Ministry: Chaplains in the Twenty-First Century.
Military Chaplain Guide 